ABANDON ALL MOTIVATION
This Article may not land with many people; it is the exact opposite of what we are taught in our modern western civilisation. Abandon motivation – it’s not what you usually hear from your Personal Trainer (or school teacher, parent, psychologist, employer, etc). However, this is exactly what I’m asking you to consider and by adopting this new way of being you will paradoxically experience a better outcome in all your endeavours while leading a happier more fulfilling life. Often a striving to be happy in the future comes from a misunderstanding of who you really are and your self-worth. A little back ground information on self-worth and confidence could be beneficial, then we will look at the more refined way of being that I have promised you.
SELF WORTH is a given, your self- worth has not changed since the day you were born, nor can it. You are unique and contribute in a way that no other human-being can. There is nobody on the planet more important than you and conversely you are no more important than anyone else. While your confidence can go up and down, there is absolutely nothing that you can do throughout your life to increase your self-worth. Every single person on the planet is extraordinary and deserves to be here.
CONFIDENCE is not the same as self-worth. Confidence relates to your own perceived ability to complete various tasks to a certain level. An example would be; Bob might have low confidence in his ability to play table tennis well, however he doesn’t take sport too seriously so his self-worth is not affected in any way. Bob might think “I’m a crap table tennis player but I’m still a top bloke”.
Let’s really drive this one home, whether your confidence in a particular endeavour is high, low or somewhere in between, YOUR SELF WORTH IS UNCONDITIONAL. It is not dependant on the conditions, the ups and downs of your life. The real you, call it ‘the soul’, call it ‘consciousness’, cannot be improved. You can awaken to it, but that awakening is only the realisation that it (you) has always been there and is always perfect.
So if the real ‘Me’ (soul/higher self/whatever label you feel comfortable with) can’t be improved in any way then why would a human bother doing anything? Simple, for enjoyment or because you are moved to do it for the benefit of others. This point is important and leads us on to the next part of this article…
WE CAUSE MOST OF OUR OWN SUFFERING NEEDLESSLY
Life can be challenging, we get sick, loved ones pass away, its not always sunshine and lollipops. Here in the modern western world however most of our problems are mental and are of our own creating. The most common cause of our wows is the delaying of happiness. Here is the general pattern we follow as humans in regards to goals/motivation/happiness
- You pick some aspect of your life in the present moment and feel unhappy about it (eg you desire more money, you want bigger biceps, I’ll be happy when I get a new job, etc)
- You Imagine an ideal situation in the future where this aspect of your life has been realised.
- You motivate yourself to strive towards the new idealised aspect/situation in the hope of being happy.
- You Inadvertently reject the perfection of the present moment and train yourself to view your happiness/contentment as being both dependant on external conditions and something that is always in the future.
This final point is the very cause of most of our suffering in the western world, and it is a horrible thing to do to yourself.
ABANDON all GOALS?
The obvious question that arises for a lot of people is “So does this mean I shouldn’t have any Goals or Hopes?”. The Simple answer is goals, hopes and aspirations are a natural part of life, as reality continues to unfold then desires, preferences and hopes will also naturally arise within you. The problem for us only occurs when we think we can’t be happy until this new desire is fulfilled. We can’t be happy next week because next week never arrives, there is always only the present moment, and this is the only place we can be happy. You don’t actually have to have any motivation to be fully present, when you are fully present and paying attention your next logical move will be readily apparent. You already know what you want, now simply start moving toward it. Pay attention, see your doors open, then walk through them.
HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE AND HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE GOING
This is where we find the paradox, by being slightly less attached to our goals we actually have more energy to pursue them. When you quieten your mind and rest in the present moment you start to discover your true nature. The quietened relaxed mind has no need for motivation, your natural unfettered mind is already vibrant. Anybody that has set aside 30 minutes a day for meditation soon realises for themselves that In your natural ground state, you are happy and content with the way life currently is. With the added realisation that life is in a constant state of change, you are also happy with where your life is heading. When your mind is in its natural (unstressed) state you also have better clarity in choosing where you would like to steer your life and what choices and actions need to be taken to get you there.
Like the dance song asks “where’s your head at”, so where is your focus? Are you draining your natural vitality by worrying about every aspect of your life or are you fully engaged in the present moment, tapped into the unlimited energy that really is you. Being aware of where your focus is directed will greatly enhance the quality of your whole life. By Slowing down your busy mind and remaining in the present moment you begin to get a better sense of who you really are and begin to contrast that knowing with the transient aspects of your life that you once strongly identified with. It’s not that you abandon worldly possessions or goals, it’s just you are not possessed by them. You play with life, you create, share and enjoy.
The person that knows their own self-worth finds that they are naturally moved to participate in beneficial actions for themselves and all others as naturally as they would take their next breath. My personal experience is that once the attachment to self-gain is relinquished (even diminished) that the desire to engage in life is greatly magnified. A well of unlimited energy becomes available to you. You are that well and always have been. When you can separate your performance and your abilities from your self-worth then life for you will move into a higher gear. Instead of doing things to chase some far off happiness, you start to do things for the pure enjoyment. Activities start to have a purity and lightness to them that was lacking previously in your awareness. Often it is the very same activities as before but with a different driving force you will have a different experience.
TAKE HOME NOTES
*Your Self Worth is Unconditional, you are meant to be here on this planet.
*Projecting your happiness on to external conditions or future events will lead to unhappiness.
*Your natural relaxed mind state is already content and full of vitality. You don’t need to do anything to achieve this, more so stop doing your habitual worrying and you will eventually arrive back in the here and now.
*With a present mind you will be naturally moved to participate in activities that are beneficial, enriching and enjoyable. No motivation will be needed. Abandon All motivation!
*Many philosophers/Authors have a better grasp on these concepts than I am able to present here. People such as A.H. Almaas, Ken Wilbur, Thich Nhat Hahn and Eckhart Tolle have a variety of books available that eloquently present the topics we have just touched on.
*My Mentor/ Sensei for the past 7 years, Joseph Scott, specialises in helping to empower people in their everyday lives. Check out www.thecoachingroom.com.au to check out the courses that are available so you can accelerate your own personal evolution.